Where Lafeyette Crosses Holly Street

I’m going to die in that intersection. I just know it. One of these mornings, something is going to happen and my life will end. A car will run the red light as I’m crossing, someone on their phone won’t be paying attention, or a bus’ brakes will fail at the worst possible moment. Somehow, some way, I’m going to die there.

I know this because I feel it. Every morning I approach the crosswalk, my skin crawls and I become more alert. I feel pressure on my left shoulder and I have to shake it off. And even on the hottest day of the year, my skins breaks into goose bumps and a chill settles around me. I believe the universe is trying to tell me something, to warn me of the dangers – what else could it be?

It may be vain to think that the universe cares about what happens to me, but I believe it has a grand plan for everyone - we all have a destiny of sorts to fulfill. In the past, I have gotten signs and feelings that have led to big moments in my life.

Two years ago when I was interning in the Governor’s press office, I awoke unmotivated and considered using my only sick day to skip work. But that’s immature and inappropriate. To settle the internal debate, I decided to flip a coin. Heads: go to work, tails: stay at home.

A flick of the thumb and I saw Washington’s face. It wasn’t the answer I wanted, so ‘two out of three’ was invoked. Heads again. ‘Three out of five’ was used. Heads again! Thinking that maybe this coin could only land on heads, I changed the rules: heads goes to bed, tails gets to work. I palmed the coin and threw it in the air. Tails.

That day, my fellow interns called out last minute, three press releases were dropped and Senator Kerry’s antics made the front cover of every newspaper. It was the busiest day that summer and I handled every intern task alone. My boss was impressed and invited me to not only write a speech for the governor but to be present when he read it out loud. The final product was dramatically different from what I wrote, but he kept the opening and part of the closing. Words I wrote came out of one of the most powerful men in Massachusetts!

So call me crazy, say I’m being ridiculous, or whatever other small-minded insult you want, but I know I’m going to die in that intersection.

-Z